Recon: THE LONGHORN

San Diego, CA


Last Saturday I traveled across the space-time continuum to a burger joint called The Longhorn. 

With Texas cattle horns, cowboy relics, and old beer posters lining the walls, it felt like a lonely trucker’s outpost along some county line with one sweet but over-worked waitress, the usual old man watching football and bundled up men hunkered down over the bar hiding from the weather.  One dirty window let in dim light, but the wood paneling crowded it out and the steam from the grill took care of the rest.

Menu’s simple enough, my brother and I split the bacon burger and added American cheese, and opted for the chili cheese fries- a dish I enjoy immensely but haven’t yet encountered on this blog.  Marie chose a bison burger with mushrooms and provolone and my Dad opted for the bacon burger with cheddar cheese.  They shared regular fries. 

Fries came out first, huge portions.  Chili was good- exactly what you’d expect .  Fries were crispy, which we loved, but Marie not so much.  All the fix-ins, so to speak, rest at the end of the table so it was a mad dash for ketchup, mustard and mayo- my favorite ingredients in a sauce for fries and burgers.  Chopped onions came in their own side cup, gotta keep your options open I guess.

 Burgers came out right after.  Open faced, toppings on the side of the plate.  Bacon was thick and crisp, our waitress was kind enough to cut the burg in half for us (You are probably wondering why I needed to share a burger, which usually is not my style: the night before we went to the Red Fox Room to celebrate my birthday and I ate a giant steak, baked potato, salad, garlic bread and carrot cake.  Needless to say, my appetite had been satiated 5 times over and retreated to recuperate!)  I instantly set about putting the delicious aforementioned sauce on my burg, a few white onion rings and the tomato slices.  I skipped the lettuce.  This was a classic American burger. The best word to describe it is dependable- hasn’t changed since the first one they made when the joint opened.  Marie wasn’t too pleased with her mushrooms- turns out they were canned, so I’d avoid them if you are a mushroom person.  But the meat was good, bacon flavorful and tableside sauce is always a plus.

They have the usual array of fountain sodas and domestic beers. I would recommend The Longhorn to anyone looking to avoid the po-lice, to make a backroom deal of some sort, or if you want to reenact a bar fight from an 80's movie… but especially for those looking to time travel.